One Goal: Education for All

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

What will I do when I get thirty?

I was approaching twenty when I told my Father that I wanted to be married at 35. And until now his reaction to that statement reverberates in my ears. I never expected a violent refusal from Tatay, though I know that he won’t agree with my idea.

Two years later I pegged it to 28. However, I felt so impatient to wait for seven years so I changed it to 26. In mid-2008, in the midst of doldrums I thought it best to be at 29, and so its 29 until this moment.

While waiting for this day to come, I am painting the man that I wish to spend my life with here on earth. Every moment that the thought of getting married comes to mind, I am reviewing my “qualification”.

Simultaneous with this, people around keep nagging me of the absence of the man that fetches me after office, which accompanies me whenever I have to do my grocery and all sorts of alibi that they may think of. I can’t tell them that based on my list, I haven’t found him yet. His face is still hidden in haze.

To be fair with the one I am waiting for, I do my part. I am praying for ‘him’ every time the thought comes in. And I pray for my self also, that I will be prepared to spend my life with him; that I will not resist a bit. At the same time, I am praying about my personal baggage, that I will overcome them or at least learn to manage them. I spend time in value formation and relationship building. I study the do’s and don’ts between man and woman in a relationship. I study gender differences. And I am taking time to visit parenting textbook. I listen to married people as they discuss real life experiences with their partners and how they get through it; all these and many other things that I do in preparation.

And there is the WHAT IF sound at the back of my head…

So what will I do when I get thirty?

Many might think that all my efforts will be wasted soon after thirty. But I think otherwise. It could be that my waiting will not come to pass but my preparation will never be wasted because I never wasted time to begin with. God will never leave me empty-handed. God’s work will never be in vain.

And when I am thirty, I will pass on whatever I learned to people who are also building themselves. It will be another chapter, and I am sure it would be as exciting as the 20s.

30s is a prime spot to train and mentor people in the 20s who are trying to gain their base. A decade of career search and so much trailblazing will be an impetus to lead others. Indeed, life never ends when our personal plans end. God have said it, many are the plans in a man’s heart, but the Lord’s plan shall prevail.